Author Archives: Reggie

TO EAT IS HUMAN; TO BE THIN, DIVINE.

If Oprah is doing it, then so am I. About every three years, I give Weight Watchers a try. It’s usually at the point where the one pair of jeans that don’t constrict my abdominal region have absolutely no more … Continue reading

Posted in community, confessions, day-to-day, dieting, health, improvement | Leave a comment

Confessions of a Weirdo

Who the fuck eats the green Mike and Ikes? Or the green lifesavers? Why do they even make that flavor? Or, is the question really: Who still eats this tooth-rotting shit? This is where my hand shoots up from the … Continue reading

Posted in confessions, errands, idiosyncracies, pet peeves, shame | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Miss Under Stood

A green complexion can make life tough. Just look at the Wicked Witch of the West. Noticing a new pimple makes me wince, so how do you think she feels waking up to a green reflection in the mirror every … Continue reading

Posted in friendship, improvement, Judgment, sentimental, shame | Tagged | Leave a comment

Stop Being So Groovy

The white robe; the white, terrycloth slippers; the little bottles of shampoo: all signs that yes, you’re in a hotel room. Then there’s the sign in the bathroom asking you to please be green and reuse your towels. It’s interesting … Continue reading

Posted in privacy, travel, trends | Leave a comment

YOU ARE (not) GROSS

“Everything off but your underwear. The doctor will be in soon,” she said as she handed me the paper gown. But, you didn’t tell me if the opening goes in the front or back. Ass first or second? Shit, I … Continue reading

Posted in aging, confidence, health, medical, nudity, shame | Leave a comment

Stop Talking

“If he don’t look good, we don’t look good. This is our president. He has to be the freshest, the flyest, [have] the flyest planes, the best factories.” That was just one soundbite from Kanye’s lunch with 45 a few … Continue reading

Posted in celebrities, memories, political | Leave a comment

Orange Is The New Pain

I am not a morning person. On weekdays, after only one snooze, I somehow get out of bed by 6:40 am. I pee, put in my contacts and smooth out my bed’s wrinkles before anally arranging my throw pillows. Then … Continue reading

Posted in aging, exercise, health | Leave a comment